Confusion

It has been a tradition for me that all my crush are my inspiration to study lessons, make blog entries, and create anything artistic.

These extraordinary species are my sources in making my everyday life innovative...but, somehow, I deviated my feelings towards someone who was supposedly part of my CRUSH LIST (let us name this specie 'a friend').

I got too close to the point of hooking myself to 'a friend'. I never thought it could be so hard, awkward, and confusing at the same time and a lot more...It was not my intention to fall for 'a friend' which is, for me, not ethical. However, I can't control how I feel.

I wrote this when I was at Tambayan, while 'a friend' and I had a little misunderstanding.

I'm feeling the pain every time the air touches my skin...my facade...
I, once upon a time, believed that "myself is the only place where I can only be mine", but why am i feeling the complete opposite?

Now, convince me, is myself the only place where I can only be mine?
Because I can't convince my 'own' anymore...

I need serenity...I need respect...I need PEACE...